💔 Breaking Up With Toxic Friends: The Midlife Mumma Edition

There’s a weird kind of heartbreak no one warns you about in your 40s:

Breaking up with a friend who’s no good for you anymore.

We expect romantic relationships to evolve or end. But friendships? We’re conditioned to believe they’re supposed to last forever. Childhood bestie, work bestie, the school mum crew—you bond, you laugh, you vent. But somewhere along the line… things shift. The energy changes. And suddenly, it’s not friendship. It’s emotional obligation.

🚩 The Red Flags We Ignore

Let’s be real:

She didn’t become toxic overnight; you just got better at spotting the signs and your gut feeling was right. This is always something you should not ignore.

Here’s what you may have missed (or excused) for far too long:

• Backhanded compliments disguised as “jokes”

• Constant competition masked as motivation

• Selective support—she’s around for your struggles, but missing during your wins

• The drama vortex—you always feel drained after talking to her

• she speaks down to you

• uses an aggressive tone

• Starts unjustified fights

If this sounds familiar, you’re not crazy. You’re just finally noticing the emotional weight of carrying a one-sided connection. No relationship should make you feel sad or depleted.

✂️ Cutting Ties Isn’t Cruel—It’s Self-Respect

We don’t owe anyone unlimited access just because we have history.

Yes, it feels awkward. Yes, you’ll doubt yourself. But you’re not abandoning a friend—you’re choosing yourself. And that’s something too many women over 40 still struggle to do unapologetically.

The truth?

You don’t need a big dramatic confrontation. You can quietly stop replying. You can pull back your energy. You can walk away without guilt. You can also express how you are feeling in a mature and controlled way, whilst still showing respect.

Because peace > pleasing. Every damn time.

💬 What No One Tells You

Friendship breakups hurt.

Even if it’s the right decision. Even if you’ve outgrown her.

You’ll grieve the memories, the inside jokes, the person she used to be—or the version of her you hoped she’d become.

But on the other side of that grief?

Freedom.

Clarity.

And space for the people who actually get you.

✨ Midlife Mumma Truth Bomb

You’re not a bad friend for letting her go.

You’re just done dimming your light for someone who couldn’t stand the shine.

Still holding on to someone who no longer feels good to be around? Ask yourself: If you met her today, would you let her in your life?

If the answer’s no, maybe it’s time to make the breakup official.

Much Love,

Mumma XOXO

Disclaimer:

I am not a licensed therapist, psychologist, or mental health professional. The information shared in this blog is based on personal experience, research, and general knowledge, and is intended for informational and supportive purposes only.

It should not be taken as professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.